People Want You to Succeed (Until You Do)

I’ve noticed something strange about “community” spaces online.

If I post that I’m struggling, people show up.
If I post confusion, grief, or self-doubt, there are hearts, replies, DMs.

But when I say, I finished something
When I say, I published a book
When I share a copyright page and a quiet moment of arrival

There’s silence.

No “congrats.”
No “what’s it about?”
No curiosity at all.

It’s not that people are cruel. I don’t think that.
It’s that completion doesn’t give people a role.

Pain invites participation.
Success just stands there.

Struggle lets people help.
Finishing something forces comparison.
And comparison freezes people faster than indifference ever could.

So we end up in this strange economy where vulnerability is rewarded,
but steadiness is invisible.
Where being unfinished feels safer to witness than being done.

What makes this stranger is that effort doesn’t disappear just because it isn’t announced.
Most people are carrying more than they post.
Pain doesn’t only exist when it’s broadcast.

If connection is only offered when someone is visibly hurting, then “community” isn’t support.
It’s triage.

I’m not sharing this to guilt anyone.
I’m sharing it because I think it’s worth naming.

Quiet accomplishments still matter.
Finished things still deserve witnesses.
Even when they don’t bleed.

Today, I’m letting this count anyway.

💙