We Should Definitely Do Something Soon

There’s a certain kind of almost-relationship that lives in a constant state of “soon.”
Not never. Not now. Just… soon.

We’d talked about hanging out. Nothing wild — maybe a walk, maybe a bite, maybe just being two people in the same ZIP code at the same time.
Instead, I got a full breakdown of their day in real time. A detailed emotional Fitbit log of intentions, delays, and maybe-laters:

• 3:00 p.m. — Physical therapy.
• 4:15 p.m. — Psychiatry appointment.
• 4:32 p.m. — “Just getting breakfast.”
• 5:00 p.m. — Might shower.
• 6:00 or 6:30? — “Maybe we could walk or get food?”

It wasn’t a bad day.
It was a tired day.
And I’ve had tired days. I’ve lived in tired months. I know what it’s like to move through fog and still try to connect.

But here’s the thing:
Somewhere in the middle of the updates, I realized I wasn’t being invited into their life.
I was being kept on the hook, politely, gently, endlessly.

I texted:

“No worries, let’s catch up soon.” 👍
Which is grown-up speak for: You’ve spun the Wheel of Logistics too many times, and I’m out of quarters.

Ten minutes later:

“I’m feeling a bit out of it… I might go to bed. What if we meet up Saturday?”

That’s when I felt it, that quiet, undeniable knowing:

I’m washing my hair on Saturday.

Not to prove a point.
Not to be dramatic.
Just because it’s the one thing in this whole story I actually know I’ll do.

Sometimes, the realization isn’t loud. It doesn’t end with closure or conflict or a big emotional conversation.

Sometimes, it’s just the moment you choose peace over possibility.
Conditioner over confusion.
Your own routine over someone else’s maybe.

We should definitely do something soon.
But not this time.
This time, I’m going to take care of myself.
And this time, that plan is real.